TiGER speaks about Chameleon and growing up in love
With Chameleon, TiGER opens the door to a more exposed chapter. The track sets the tone for a debut album that is reflective, rooted in emotional growth, and a shift in perspective on love and danger. In this conversation, TiGER speaks on looking back with clear eyes, turning past experience into sound, and why this moment felt like the right place to begin.
Chameleon opens your debut album and introduces a darker emotional landscape. Why did this story feel like the right place to begin?
I was 18 in this song and it marks the beginning of my emotional maturation. I believe that there is wisdom to be gained from everything and over the span of a decade I certainly got wiser. The album is about my idea of love being turned upside down on its head. Everything that I thought love or romance was before the age of 18 went out the window in the real world. Chameleon shows the marriage between realism and romanticism - understand that and in my opinion you understand the world.
The idea of aposematism frames the song through beauty and danger. When did you first recognise that tension in your own life?
ALL MY LIFE Nick. Being a child of a particularly toxic divorce, I think I learned how to see the world through more than one lens. You kind of compartmentalise the good, the bad, the beautiful, the ugly, the safe and the dangerous. But at the same time, you have to accept all of it. None of my relationships have worked out so far, so sometimes I feel like I might be poisonous, slithering around in my flamboyant colours and animal prints - a lot of animals have bright colours to ward off predators - I wonder if I'm the same.
Your earlier releases leaned into warmth, romance and soul. How does Chameleon reflect a shift in self awareness since those songs?
My earlier releases were written in the present with a fairly fresh perspective, whereas Chameleon is written in retrospect. Because this song was written so long ago, when I pulled it back out to work on again, I felt colder, detached, and had the objectivity to evolve it into something more than what it originally was.
The track explores naivety giving way to clarity. What moment forced you to see the truth beneath the surface?
It came in waves. The first wave came after my first boyfriend showed his cowardice and left me without properly breaking things off. The second wave was when I found out he had emotionally cheated on me and had left me for that person. The third wave was finding out from said new lover that he was abusive. Mulling in the trauma of another I was able to realise how lucky I was that that wasn't me. I then thought about why wasn't that me. Why was I not abused by him? I realised it was because although my naivety blinded me, it also protected me. I was able to be my people-pleasing 18 year old self without fear, judgment or suspicion.
Your sound blends R&B, and jazz textures. How did the production choices support the emotional weight of this story?
In my opinion these genres are the best for conveying pain and its nuances. It enabled me to fill in the gaps with cinema in a way that was cohesive.
How did receiving NZ On Air support shape the scope of Chameleon, and in what ways did that backing give you freedom to push your sound and visual world further than before?
Without it I wouldn't have been able to appreciate the people needed to make the song. It also gave me the opportunity to film my first professional music video to the artistic quality it deserved. On top of that, I was able to get an independent label to work with me in promoting the song. It opened doors and allowed me to level up my craft and my reach.
This album looks back on your past with grandeur and intensity. What part of your younger self did you need to meet again through this work?
I've always struggled with my self-esteem. There's so much longing and restlessness in this project. My ex-fiance once said to me that there was something very wounded about me - I genuinely think that getting this album done as soon as I can will help me heal a lot of those wounds.
As you move deeper into this new era, what have you learned about self protection, desire and becoming whole?
Because the single and the project is based on the past decade, it's not really a new era. I feel that I am emptying baggage - trimming the fat. I'm very guarded these days but I'm progressing into someone who is more grounded. My desires have matured and I'm a lot more willing to listen to my instincts.
